In Loving Memory...

Abby, your post reminded me that I have this song recorded

with Shelby, Sara, Micah and I singing it. So many memories.

One of Shelby's favorite songs was "legacy" by

Nichole Nordeman. She definitely left a legacy. 

I can't believe it's been 3 years since I've seen her.

I miss her hugs, I wish she could hug me tonight.

Thinking about her makes me miss her, and not

so much wish her back as much as look

forward to being with her. I don't think I ever

thought much about or looked forward to heaven

as much as I have these last several years. Having

someone so close and special there makes heaven

seem so much more real and alive.

This picture of Shelby (above) has become a

favorite of mine. Although it makes me cry to

look at it's so convicting to me. Shelby's expression

in that picture reflected the upbeat and positive

attitude she kept through the whole long trial that

she went through. It's a great reminder to me when

I'm complaining about small and insignificant trials

I face on a day to day basis. Shelby was a very positive

and energetic person to be around, I miss that so much!

This picture was one of the last times she was in Haiti.

She already had quite a large tumor in

her leg at that time, and was in pain most of the trip.

Her love for Haiti was so strong however that

this didn't stop her from going.

Shelby had such a heart for missions.

The last big project Shelby and I worked really

closely together on was my wedding. Shelby and

Sara both put so much into that day for me.

One memory that especially stands out to me was

the morning I was to have my bridal pictures done.

Sara was doing my hair and we both realized that

we had all completely forgotten to get a tiara. 

The picture I had torn out of a magazine to buy was

made of shells with a star fish in the middle. While

I was stressing trying to decide what to do and Sara

was trying to keep me still to finish my hair Shelby

went threw her room gathering shells from her

amazing collection and with a hot glue gun made

an amazing tiara for me that I LOVED and still have.

She was our creative "Martha Stewart" of the house

with meals, organizing, decorating the house for holidays

or planning parties and hosting large events.

Shelby was one of the most creative people I'll ever know.

This picture means so much to me. This was the

last team we did where Shelby was full strength.

This was a couple months after Micah and I were

married. Anyone who ever went on a team with us

saw first hand what a crazy hard worker Shelby was.

After spending looong days in the Mexico summer

heat building houses Shelby would go back to the

house and make the meals for everyone, then

up first thing in the morning serving breakfast.

On the job site Shelby was the paint leader for

one of the teams. My Mom and us girls would call her

the paint pig (when we were little we had a book called

"Mr. Paint Pig") because she would wear her paint

clothes completely out till she was wearing more

paint than fabric. We've talked about framing

some of the paint clothes she wore.

Shelby was such a hard and energetic worker

who loved to serve in so many ways.

I'm so happy Shelby got to meet Heidi before she

left us. I always feel a special connection to her through

Heidi. So many of the things Heidi does (as a first born)

remind me of things Shelby (a firstborn as well) did.

When Heidi was first born we all thought she looked

like Shelby too. She doesn't look quite as much like her

now as she did then. After Shelby went to heaven my

Dad was reading in her journal about Heidi and she

wrote that "people say she looks like me, YEAH!" 

I loved that she got to meet her even if it was for a

short time. The night Heidi was born Shelby and the

family were at a hospital in Houston. They all came

as soon as they could to meet Heidi. 

Shelby and I were very different in many ways,

but she completely spoiled and mothered me

in every way, till I was married and came home one

day completely shocked realizing I had to make

my own food now and clean my own house.

Shelby and I always shared a special bond.

Growing up anytime I got hurt I wouldn't let

any of my siblings come near me except Shelby.

Shelby would always so lovingly take me to Mom

to get patched up. One time during a long hike in

Haiti I fell, completely skinning both of my knees

and elbows and cut a big gash in my arm that I still have

a good scare from. All of my many brothers tried to help

me offering to carry me back etc. but I wouldn't let

them touch me (yes I know I was a brat) Shelby

came and put my arm over her shoulder and very

slowly took me all the way back home which was

at least an hour hike UP. Shelby was the best

big sister I could have had. I miss her SO much! 

As this weekend comes I'm trying not to think

so much about what happened at 7:15 pm. May 31, 05

but rather how special Shelby was to me through out all

of the years she was here. About how grateful I am that

God gave her to me as a sister to know for 22 years.

I also want to think about Shelby now and what she is

doing. I think that she is dancing. I was supposed to paint

her toe nails purple for her but only got one foot done

that day so she has purple toe nails on one foot and

blue on the other. I think she likes it that way, purple

and blue were her favorite colors. Although Heidi

insists her dress must be pink I like to picture her

in a white dress, dancing with her hair down, and laughing.

I miss her laugh, we loved to make each other laugh,

especially at embarrassing times.   

I miss you Shelby and can't wait to see you again.